The Piggy POV
by detectivejigsaw
Summary: Waddles was a simple pig with simple pleasures: eat, sleep, play, be cared for by his gods. A look into the mind of Mabel's beloved pet.


Waddles's life was a relatively simple one, with simple pleasures: eat, sleep, play, be cared for by his gods.

There were three of them, with a couple of minor gods who seemed to be servants of the others, since they didn't live in the Barn with them.

His favorite was probably the one with the long mane and the shining teeth, who was the source of food and secret dance parties and cuddles. The other one who as about the same height was kind of sweaty, and his voice reminded Waddles of a rooster's, but he was pleasant enough, he supposed.

But the wrinkly one…

The wrinkly one was interesting. He wasn't big on cuddling or dance parties, but occasionally he tasted delicious enough to be worth licking. And he was bigger and stronger than the smaller gods, strong enough to carry Waddles in the strange other place he'd been taken to once by the giant eagle creature. And he talked to Waddles, just like the long-maned one did (usually when no one else was around, though; the pig suspected he was trying to give him some kind of secret messages, if only he could figure them out...). And he had more power than the others; he could make everything in the Barn rise off the ground and fly like the birds, at least at night.

He was obviously the Farmer, so Waddles gave him the respect he was due.

* * *

Then one day, after the Barn had been filled with strange demons who tried to take it over, there was a fourth god-another wrinkly one, but he smelled bad compared to the Farmer, not lickable at all, and the two of them were always fighting for dominance. Waddles suspected that the new wrinkly god was trying to become the new Farmer; he wasn't sure how he felt about that. Because yes, the small ones seemed to like him, especially the sweaty one, but he never petted Waddles or tasted delicious-he spent most of his time hidden away in the Storm Cellar, and didn't seem to know anything about running the Barn. In Waddles's opinion, he was a pretty poor excuse for a god.

Then came the time when he and the long-maned god were on a Farm that shone like the sun, and tasted even sweeter than the sweetest corn. The long-maned god seemed to be the Farmer here, and made sure that Waddles had plenty of cuddles and tummy tickling and food...but he wanted to be back at the first Farm. Something about this one tasted like an apple that was rotten in the middle. And he missed the other gods.

Eventually, the sweaty god and their servants came to retrieve the long-maned god, and they all returned to the real Farm and the real Farmer, to Waddles's relief. He wanted to lick him, to show proper fealty and express how happy he was to be back under his care, but he didn't get the chance then.

* * *

It wasn't until the long night ended, in fact, that Waddles finally got that chance. All the gods-even the new wrinkly one-were back in the Barn, and the Farmer was sitting on his throne while they showed him proper worship, so Waddles took his chance: he jumped into the Farmer's lap and began licking his face.

Oh happy day, he still tasted as delicious as ever!

The Farmer was so overjoyed at being shown proper obeisance that he raised Waddles into the air and said his name in a loud voice; the pig licked him more fervently in gratitude for this honor. Judging by how pleased the other gods were, he knew they were glad that their Farmer had such a dedicated subject-even the new wrinkly god seemed to have stopped trying to usurp him.

And Waddles was as happy as a pig could be.

* * *

**Okay, I swear I'm not trying to be blasphemous here.**

**Waddles's perception of everyone is kind of based on this one book by Terry Pratchett, ****_The Truth_****, where there's a dog who views his owner as his god. I'm not trying to offend anyone. I dunno if anyone will be offended instead of amused by this, but I wanna cover my bases just in case.**

**And yes, I realize this story is weird. But that's kind of the point. And I've never been a pig before, so I dunno how they think; this is just an educated guess.**


End file.
